Free relationship clarity scorecard
Unsure about your relationship? Start here.
Get clear on what you need, where you’re leaning, and what to do next.
Did you know most people who feel unsure in their relationship aren’t missing information? They’re missing trust in their own read. One day it feels like “it’s not that bad.” The next it feels like “I can’t keep doing this.” And every friend has a different opinion.
Mixed feelings are normal, especially when life is changing. They don’t mean you’re broken, or that your relationship is. They’re information.
This scorecard takes about four minutes. You’ll answer on your own. You’ll see where you’re leaning, what’s working, and the one area that needs your attention most. Then you’ll get two free workbooks to help you decide your next step, in your own time.
Written by Dana Peters, MA, a relationship coach with a master’s degree in marriage and family therapy, Level 1 training in the Gottman Method, and extensive training in Imago.
Your answers are private. Nothing here tells you what to do. It helps you hear yourself.
This scorecard is for people who feel safe in their relationship and want clarity. If you ever feel afraid of your partner, or feel controlled or hurt, please reach out to the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or thehotline.org. You deserve support that fits what you’re going through.
Before anything else
You deserve to feel safe.
What you shared tells me a coaching scorecard isn’t the right tool for everything you’re facing. Please reach out to the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233, text START to 88788, or chat at thehotline.org. It’s free, confidential and open 24 hours a day. Your results are below, whenever you’re ready.
This scorecard is for people who feel safe in their relationship and want clarity. If you ever feel afraid of your partner, or feel controlled or hurt, please reach out to the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or thehotline.org. You deserve support that fits what you’re going through.
Where you’re leaning
What you told me
What’s working
What this is asking of you
Try this today
A next step for the two of you
Your partner can take the free couples quiz too. You’ll each answer on your own, then see your results side by side.
Take the couples quizYour four areas
Your growth edge:
Your free relationship clarity plans
Two workbooks, made for where you are
Matched to where you’re leaning
The foundation
Your Relationship Clarity Plan: Name What You Need
The foundation for every next step. Sort your needs, wants and dealbreakers, separate what’s about the relationship from what’s changing in you, and put your needs into words.
Want someone in your corner?
In a free 30-minute consultation, we’ll look at your results and talk through what you want next. No agenda, no pressure either way.
Book a free consultationThis scorecard is for people who feel safe in their relationship and want clarity. If you ever feel afraid of your partner, or feel controlled or hurt, please reach out to the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or thehotline.org. You deserve support that fits what you’re going through.
Questions about the scorecard
How do I know if I should stay in my relationship?
No quiz can answer that for you, and this one won’t try. What it can do is help you see what you need, where you’re leaning and what’s missing, so you can trust your own decision and take your next step with a clear head.
Is it normal to feel unsure in a long relationship?
Yes. Mixed feelings are common, especially during life changes like a new baby, a career shift or kids leaving home. They don’t mean something is wrong with you or your relationship. They’re information about what you need.
What happens after the scorecard?
You’ll see where you’re leaning, your scores in four areas and your growth edge. You’ll also get two free Relationship Clarity Plans: one matched to where you’re leaning, and Name What You Need. Fill them in online on a phone or computer, or download and print them.
Should my partner take it too?
This scorecard is for you, on your own. If you’re leaning in and want to work on things together, the free couples quiz is made for both partners to take separately and compare.
Who created this scorecard?
Dana Peters, MA, a life and relationship coach in Lafayette, CA. Dana holds a master’s degree in marriage and family therapy, has completed Level 1 training in the Gottman Method, and trained extensively in Imago in graduate school. She coaches individuals and couples in person in Lafayette and online.